Too Much Noise From the School

School cited for excessive noise after neighbor complains to police. For more on the story click here.

A Bag of Prunes and a Box of High-fiber Breakfast Cereal Helped Complete Engagement

Man puts engagement ring in milkshake and she swallows it. For more on the engagement click here.

Fleeing Suspect Flips Police

During a Texas police chase the suspect rammed two police vehicles and in the process flipped one. To see the video and find out why the suspect was running click here.

Mayonnaise jar and 2 beers

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 beers.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls . He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous 'yes.' The professor then produced two Beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

'Now,' said the professor as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things---your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions---and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car.

The sand is everything else---the small stuff. 'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

'Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Spend time with your children. Spend time with your parents. Visit with grandparents. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf ball first---the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.'

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the Beer represented... The professor smiled and said, 'I'm glad you asked.' The Beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of Beers with a friend.'

Please share this with someone you care about... I JUST DID.

Something funny is the craziness

I admit, I haven't been following Madoff too closely... but even understanding the ridiculous amount he's accused of taking from his clients... this testimony from whistle blower Harry Markopolos is hilarious... watch the whole thing... but it's around 40 seconds where it gets good. Like the reason why we posted the "Drunk and a Priest", sometimes, in these times, we just have to laugh.

"Obama can do whatever he like"

Now we know President Obama is going to work with both sides of the aisle for the greater good of our country, but this video came by email, and it's pretty amusing. The Ron Clark Academy students were very good to T.I.'s beat. This is just pretty funny...

A drunk and a priest are on the subway together...

In these tough times everybody needs a laugh. But this is serious and there may be some realism to it. ... An email I received:

WHAT CAUSES ARTHRITIS?

A drunken man who smelled like beer sat down on a subway next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half-empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading.

After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked, 'Say Father, what causes arthritis?'

The priest replies, 'My Son, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, contempt for your fellow man, sleeping with prostitutes and lack of a bath.'

The drunk muttered in response, 'Well, I'll be darn,' then returned to his paper.

The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized. 'I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?' The drunk answered, 'I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does.'

MORAL: Make sure you understand the question before offering the
answer

"...sex in their golf cart..."

The "Villages" in Central Florida is a hot spot for old people. The primary pastimes "getting lucky." For more about this Central Florida complex click here to read more from Fox News.

Lets talk...

A friend sent this... and it's hilarious...

A stranger was seated next to a little black girl on the airplane when the stranger turned to her and said, “Let's talk. I've heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.”

The little girl, who had just opened her coloring book, closed it slowly and said to the stranger, “What would you like to talk about?”

“Oh, I don't know,” said the stranger. “Since you are a Negro, do you think that So-called President Elect Barack Obama is qualified for the job?” and he smiles.

“OK”, she said. 'That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff - grass -. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?”

The stranger, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it and says, “Hmmm, I have no idea.” To which the little girl replies, “Do you really feel qualified to discuss President Barack Obama... when you don't know sh*t?”